What can I say...he's packing some serious heat down there. You wouldn't expect that looking at him, huh?
I guess God knew he was going to be bald...
genius alert. I just invented a contraption made of toilet paper and rubber bands that makes it so your balls don't stick to your leg when you wake up from sleeping. I call it, The Balldozer
call of duty 2 was the straight man's twilight
Internet sex stories have completely ruined the word sopping for me.
At home depot. Final room inspection is tmrow, gotta paint over the puke stains
but he gave me mouthwash after the bj. no ones ever done that for me before.
I think he's having people over to watch him get way too drunk again
I'LL COME GET YOU. GOTTA FIND A SUIT THAT COVERS TIT BRUISES FIRST.
So we were in bed when his brother walks in, walks over to me, fist bumps me and says he just wanted to say hi, then leaves...so random lmao
Well he has a golden retriever set as his background so there's no way he was filming us having sex
He used his penis as a drumstick on my back and had me guess what song he was playing.
I wanted to write an apology letter to my vagina after that.
We were driving past a farm when he screamed at me to stop the car, then he jumped out and tried to ride a cow.
I called him Oliver all night
His name is Brandon
Dude... Those don't even start with the same letter...
Talk all the shit you want but I slept in a oversized monster truck tire last night.
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