dude can i febreze my hair or is that slutty?
i dont care that its taken 20 hrs to pee without hurting, BEST HATE SEX EVER.
I just watched a blind kid buy from one of the vending machines on campus...guess there's nothing like a good surprise?
she insisted that i refer to her boobs by name.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Pretty sure I just became the first person ever to use the word "boner" in a wedding card...
What can I say, he stumbled upon the key to my heart: orgasms and mac 'n cheese.
karaoke mosh pit has descended into fisticuffs, send backup
I think he was trying to tie my clitoris in a knot with his tongue. So awful.
This Halloween will be different. I'm just here to get shitfaced, not troll around looking for slutty nun pussy.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Returning my drunken purchases from last night. Not a single thing I bought was on sale.
When are you going to accept the fact he is gay?
Come on... He's just practicing.
Ok. That's acceptable.
Please tell me those naked pics were not your mom. Lie if you have to.
You're seeing with your vagina, not your eyes.
Remember that St. Patrick's Day when I fucked your married coworker in his truck and the whole bar was chanting for you "Don't fuck Mike"?! #TheLuckOfTheIrish 🍀
Looks like a sea otter shaved my vagina. Keep an eye out for me this weekend, no one can see this.
Randomize