Is this going to be a big send off or a somber occasion? Just need to know if I should start drinking on the train or not.
yeah i like to chase my xanax with prozac and then viagra. you're up...and then you're UP
The Firefighter Games are going to be in Tampa the same weekend I am. I think God is answering my vagina's prayers.
You were petting your shoe and saying this makes me really happy
seriously who else gets carried home puking from a fucking mary kay party?
Just found a quarter that has been stuck to my boob since at least last night.
He fell asleep and they duct taped him to the floor. He's pissed.
And after we were done he said "Let's play a game! Who can find their clothes first"
Also this guy fingered me at the bar and then gave me his card
On the way home there was a guy passed out IN the road on Colfax with his pants around his ankles, completely bare assed. If he was dressed as a speed bump, he succeeded.
My roommate walked in naked grabbed my hand and pulled me into her room to see her randoms dick.
I feel like one thing if I have going for me is that my bed looks like a nice place to have sex
Please don't tell me that blonde guys name is Matthew I won't be able to fuck a guy with my brothers name
It was a fun night. I made out with the door guy at the gay bar but he didn't speak english
There was no door guy at the bar
I just threw up in front of a bunch of parents/prospective students while they were on a campus tour..awesome..
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