That's your vagina. No one goes out and burns it
That shot tasted like Sant Claus came in my mouth. I love the holidays.
I'm just trying to think of how much money Little Debbie would make if pot was legalized.
Judging by my dry clothes and wet sheets, I think I might have gotten out of bed, pissed ON it, covered it up, and passed out on top of it
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
did i paint my nails blue or do i need to make a trip to the ER?
Driving by his house every hour is not stalking, it's a reconnaissance mission... How else can I confront him
You were running around yelling "BUKAKE!" and squirting people with a shampoo bottle you found. Total shitshow.
What made this night legendary was getting pulled over for looking suspicious while wearing an iron man mask
That's the kind of activity you can only get away with by wearing a lion codpiece
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I made out with a guy who was dressed as Borat
And like a minute in, I was like oh fuck what am I doing
Did you run away?
I DANCED AWAY.
showering high made me realize that i should seriously reconsider my career path... id be a damn good hair shampooer & head massager
But I mean how many guys can say they get blow jobs and grilled cheese with football
Can't believe we're making vacation plans with the guy we had a threesome with
Fuck you. Fuck this party. I just wanted to be pretty with a cute little tiara and boys sucking my tits, now i have a hangman game drawn on my face and jello shots in my hair.
I wanted to give you a great birthday party. You know I did.
no real plans this weekend. trying to derail the alcohol induced fucking hell train I've been riding for the past three weeks.
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