Ha. Yes. I'm at a strip club. I'm the barack obama of strip clubs
If I were a boy, I'd name my penis Reptar.
i feel like the song jizz in my pants was made for him.
We had to be out of the dorms at 730. Meeting started at 8. I woke up at 948. Drunk and covered in glitter.
There are rumors he has a square penis....ill do anything though....
I can't really talk right now. I'm getting on a plane to Oregon to go give a guy a bj. I'll see you in three days.
gross. I think i'll just donate all my eggs. My children will be incredible, but they're not welcome in my womb
Cancel that soberness update. I just almost fell down in the security line
we all took turns holding you up and pretending that you were simba and that we were presenting you to the jungle
You used up your allotted blow job minutes for the month of April last night anyways
I found a fingernail in my vagina. A fingernail.
You can see my drunken state get worse with each picture
He came over and fucked me while my conference call was on mute. Working from home is the best.
I have booze and I wanna give you a bj. How can you be mad at me?
Omfg I just White Claw shamed a Girl Scout Cookie mom and I feel SO BAD.
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