I don't apprectiate you insinuating that my breasts have a sort of bremuda triangle effect
A lesson I learned in the hospital....when you masturbate while attached to a heart monitor, it scares the nurses a lot.
I made a game called come to class high and eat nachos.
Then you started asking people on the drunk bus if they knew the word "gumption". if they didn't you told them they weren't taking advantage of their high education opportunities and you were disappointed in them.
Seriously, it sounds like someone is torturing a dozen cats inside a Japanese techno club while a jamaican yells random hipster words through a megaphone.
There were four people in the car. The girls sure know how to blow. I think we almost crashed when the driver climaxed.
Every time I someone I meet again from that wedding it turns into the "Oh your the guy who puked in the hallway and passed out in front of the elevator."
if I blackout nd am found tomorrow w butterfly hairclips on my nipples and my habd down my pants tell my family I am sorry
I think I ejaculated my soul out.
Cheese, the small of a woman's back, the universe, mountains, vampiric demons, sleep, and dreams.
He managed to rip my nipple last night....
I'm upset for all the future generations who can't drunkenly get cheesy bread
I AM OFFICIALLY LICENSED TO BE A LESBIAN
The neighbors in the apartment above us are at it again. The roleplay this time is cop and prostitute. I give it 30 minutes, you? Already sounds better than the last one
Stop thinking about me and go on your date... at least I got the glitter off your face first.
Randomize
