are we going to glenview for practice??
(3 hrs later) aids
where r u? what is story? im way too high right now
No matter how drunk I am, I will take the time to wipe a pube off the toilet seat.
He kept saying 'your mouth is Amazing' even after I was on his dick.
We eventually get in a cab (after david tried to hail multiple regular cars and some sort of shuttle bus)
He wants to know how I lost my bra in his pants....id like to know too
I woke up covered in his pee. And then he poked me on Facebook.
I had to rip your toilet paper for you...
Why were my jeans in the freezer of the mini fridge, and how long have they been in there? On another note, I found my teacher's ID badge.
Stripper just cleaned my glasses with her nipple...
He pointed at me, then leaned in and said "shes the best at blow jobs" then chris fist pumped him and said "dude, I know"
Listen, unless you want to spend your birthday in a trunk, you better invite me
Def over. He sent me a nude selfie but cropped it right above his junk. Total Silence of the Fucking lambs looking.
You did things that should be illegal to a Twinkie and asked strangers to drive you home.
Herpes is not a lady problem you can solve with shower beers and kissing boys
last night I learned that if you try to buy tacos in this town, that you will be stopped by three cop cars with breathalizers
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