I'm not saying he was bad at sex, but I'm pretty sure I anti-climaxed.
Oh and ps....i was sleeping soundly until i woke up by the sound of amy on the phone with her mom sobbing hysterically because she can't stop having the shits.
NO FUCKING WAY. PLEASE MAKE HER IMPLANT THAT POOR KID INTO A RESPONSIBLE UTERUS.
when did my "fat clothes" just become my clothes...diet starts tomorrow
She thought someone was breaking in but when I said it was me she got even angrier and threw a coffee mug at my head.
He told me his penis would be a "Sad Panda" if I didn't give it a ride through the jungle.
Was this before, or after you took my brand new bag of shredded cheese, and "Made it rain"?
Do you think the Slutcracker will use the original score? I'll be so sad if they don't.
She tried to cook Velveeta IN the oven on clean mode.
HIS TAN HAS PUT ME TO SHAME. HE TOOK HIS PANTS OFF AND HIS DICK LOOKED LIKE A GHOST
I hear fucking Christmas music. I'm going to find fucking Santa and tell him to suck a dick and shut up for the next month
Hypothetically how does one go about throwing away a dildo?
Also bring a pizza or no entry to my vagina OR the fort.
Cheese only
sweating bourbon at client mtg -- you?
I may have had several rum punches and then gone to the store and used European cucumbers to prove my baton twirling prowess.
Randomize
