I just watched a guy get turned down by a prostitute
I just drove by a church. On the sign out front was written 'crocodile cock'. On both sides.
shes got a 6th sense for me cheating...the the hailey joel osmound of me getting bjs
I just wished the taco bell drive thru guy a happy cinco de mayo. Who says arizonians hate mexicans?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He's engaged. If the world's smallest penis can find true love than I can too.
She climbed through the window and into my bed. Not even sure who she is. Was thinking she might be a friend of yours?
He SHOWED UP to the party wearing one shoe and a dinosaur hat. He kept lifting up his shirt and asking people to bite his nipple.
If you don't get head tonight I will castrate you
Seriously. Castrate.
Got head last night. Had the 3D glasses on the whole time.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude I broke her toilet blowing some dude. I wasn't going to turn down the 300$ he offered to fix it.
His penis could choke an elephant. A baby elephant... But an elephant non the less.
I didn't even know this guy existed until he'd had his hands down my pants, so I just went with it.
Too stoned. Randomly can't get the image of Emilio estevez's smiling face out of my head. What is life.
Sorry for drunkely attacking your best friend with a bow and arrow then loudly crying myself to sleep....PMS?
Welp just ran into my high school history teacher while buying a pregnancy test...there goes my veil of innocence in this town.
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