You're never going to guess who I just worked out next to..
Who?
Chris brown
No way... I bet he was intense
Are you kidding? He was prob training for round two
I would kick you in the vagina but I'm afraid I would lose my shoe.
I'm sorry you missed class, the topic today is copy and paste. I'm not even kidding.
It was mandatory to shotgun a beer before we were allowed to eat dinner
Just had a pleasant conversation with a mugger while he was taking off my shoes. Why can't I get along with people like this sober?
Well yes but because of that incident i now salute to truck drivers
Oh my fucking god I saw the pictures. What the mother fucking fuck. Destroy the pictures. Destroy the fucking pictures.
Please confirm the destruction of the pictures. NOW.
You told her dad that you were gonna "superman that ho" I love the first impressions you make
Honestly you'd think more guys would be happy to date a cute female dealer, but apparently something about safety or whatever
I love him about as much as I'd love fucking myself with a cactus.
Girl. There is no more toilet paper. You should have seen the twerking I just did to shake the pee off.
honestly if there were pictures of last night i would be embarrassed.... im embarrassed without pictures
"Why is there a bottle of Tequila taped to the fan?"
Idk but when you think about it the last time I did bottomless mimosas I ended up getting my nipples pierced so it might be fair
Idk if I want to put a bra on
Randomize
