I want 2 things right now, you or a cig
cig
I wish you were here to vomit in your hand.
she looked like she should be chained to micheal vicks radiator
Dude, it's gettin so bad even my fantasies just wanna be friends.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i just picked a peanut m&m up off the floor. with my toes. and then proceeded to eat it.
my mothers day present is going to be not puking at the table during brunch
I need to get skinnier so that I know when pregnancy scares are real...
Great night. I'm in the middle of explaining to her how the stock market works and she just rips my pants off and starts blowing me. Nerdiest blowjob ever.
I feel like i'm walking on a never-ending field of baby sheep.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
our friendships a beautiful delicate flower...that has been crushed by peni
nana can keg stand better than me. should i be proud?
I'll miss you, too. On the bright side, a night away from one another might give me a chance to recup seminal fluids.
You used your chihuahua as a pillow screaming "HE'S A PILLOW AND A PET" and proceeded to puke in the dog bed
I swear to God if you fuck my cousin I will fuck your dad.
my boobs just made me lose a game of beer pong. the balls hit them, bounced off and into the cup. twice. ive never been so disappointed in them.
Randomize