Small Doughy Asian men and sleeveless hoodies with nothing underneath do not mix well.
Sounds like the climatic scene of my favorite erotic novel.
Do you think they'll have a special part during the BET awards for Michael Jackson even though he turned white?
my lips still taste like vagina
so you liked breakfast?
ehh, still wish we woulda went to IHOP instead
So my teacher figured out I made a drinking game out of her lecture. Once my drink was gone she let us out. Happy St. Patricks day class. Your welcome
what kind of wine goes with anal sex and shame?
Trying to figure out which chair my head was under last night
Is it too forward to say "stop being a good friend and start being a good fuck buddy"
Although a guy bought me a shot of fireball last wknd and I told him he wouldn't even get half a handjob for that and walked away so don't tell me I don't have standards
I was 100% done.. I used my vibrator while eating cold pizza. Shit was magical.
I'm pretty sure I just orgasmned my way out of paying for that weed
He had the same tone in his voice and look in his eyes that he gets when he says UFOs aren't real.
Full body rubs, head scratches, foot rubs, massages, a penis that is able to get hard whenever you want it. I mean ive got a lot to offer
I could not add him. He gets 5 likes on Instagram.
This town reeks of teen pregnancy.
Look, I need your help, not your judgment.
Randomize
