thanks for house sitting, cat must be hiding again... everything go ok?
... about that ...
Is it just me or are more fat girls getting belly button piercing these days?
I am 90% sure the kid in front of me in class is picking his face spots, smelling it, and then eating it. That is a LOT of % sure for something like that.
you know you were refereeing rock paper scissors for who got to make out with your sister right?
I introduced him to the male G-Spot. Don't ever tell me I'm not experienced.
someday when you wake up in a dumpster we'll have to have this conversation again...
I left puerto rico a week ago and my vagina still smells like coconut.
They showed a guy on tv in a Brady jersey and a sweatpants boner when the NE offense took the field. They didn't show his face. I hope that wasn't you.
It was like die hard. Except with more penises.
When I go out tonight I need to make sure to be really good. The Easter bunny doesn't deliver to jail
The appetizer at the dinner I went to tonight was Klonopin and a Bloody Mary.
he told me that he only likes small dogs. I should have known he was going to end up being little bitch.
I was playing 'If You Had To Fuck One or Die' with the old composite pictures with a guy in the bathroom line. They were all pretty ugly so I go "You can tell this is a lower tier frat"......turns out the guy was a brother
We were high and the scary movies were scaring us too bad. Were all watching porn instead now
The people above me are fucking to Miley Cyrus
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