on a scale of one to ten, how awkward would it i told him i had to go change my tampon and then left?
11
oh my god i am going to vomit. and little burgers wearing crowns are going to come out.
This girl told me she was a virgin the other day. I felt like I was talking to a unicorn.
We have literally factored in $2200 for bail money in the budget. This vegas trip will be out of hand. We are signing confidentiality contracts.
When did you hit me on the head with a stool?
nope, if she's going to skank it up with ginge-a-saurus douche she deserves the silent treatment.
Yea no bueno and I only brought enough weed to last one night. And it was no Hanukah nug, it didn't last 8 days.
Eh maybe I should give her a chance. Let's see where making a porno takes the friendship
All I am going to say is this: I woke up with lots of bruises on my knees from running around on all fours being a 'dinosaur'. Either girls night in went terribly wrong or terribly right.
My mouth is so dry that I'm about to put a straw in a jar of Vaseline and chug. This all addi diet definitely has its ups and downs.
YO CONGRATULATIONS ON YOUR MÉNAGE À TROIS. YOU GO, GLENN COCO
I met his parents. We played twister. My boob popped out.
You can say goodbye to our security deposit.
Already? What he do?
Opened a bag of topsoil at the party and spread it all over the living room. TOPSOIL!
Its like your face is a pile of corn and I'm a chicken
...What??
What's the point of having a gay best friend if he doesn't play with your titties?
Randomize
