At a stoplight watching a woman push groceries in a stroller while dodging oncoming traffic... Reallllly Detroit?
This is how I know I have no life... Jon and Kate are my emotional roller coaster.
he is fucking friends with his exwife on facebook, but he defriends me after 3 dates? am i that crazy?
I havnt had this much beer since i losodt my virginity. thank. god.
Just 30 Funny Tumblr Posts About Starbucks
I just got a ticket for the snow penis we made in our front yard.
Just hungoverly hit my funny bone with a hot straightener. Triple threat.
She is wearing lilly and pearls while drinking natty from a monogrammed coozie. If that isn't a sorosititue I don't know what is
She threw up on me during morning sex and now Im pretty sure I just saw a woman die at 7-eleven. This is way too much for a Monday morning
omg I just had an epiphany about why I grew into such a whore....
HAVE YOU EVER NOTICED WHAT THE SPICE GIRLS USED TO WEAR?!? those were my idols, I never stood a chance
18 People Are Kind Of A**holes But Also Completely Hilarious
Was that your vagina? Received a text pic from a number I didn't recognize. Shaved, so no hair color cues. But it looked like your lips.
OMG. Dad just threw a 100 dollar bill down on the table for a girl to lift her shirt. I think he was kidding, but...
I unknowingly motorboated my boyfriend's ex-gf last night. Yay me!
This is the drunkest I've ever been at a chili's
I woke up like how did I get here this blanket is nice but it was just the curtain
my goal is to never have a bac of 0.0 the whole time while in the state of florida, which means i have to chug a beer before i cross the state line