In line at the arbys drive thru on foot. Legendary.
well that one time I was being a total idiot trying to see how much I could drink. turns out 22 shots is too much. surprise surprise! ambulance party!
Thats the last time I go out drinking with my Irish friends. Two shots of flaming sambucca = bar on fire. I was only trying to high five the barman.
For what it's worth, your chances of anal go up the more she loves you. There's always a silver lining.
I barely even remember him. He is just a distant beard in my past.
he's home with a concussion now...but apparently i'm still the highlight of his freshman year
Your boyfriend and I are bonding over your giant dick.
She was giving me head while we were in my tree house, my mom then came out to let the dog out so she stopped so I would stop groaning, was it good? You tell me
My mouth feels like it's at the dentist but my body feels like it's at the strip club.
Also, I've finally come to the point in the relationship when having sex with socks on is ok.
Yeah, I fucked him. and the worst part is his name was Jesus. And nobody said it in Spanish. Just Jesus. There is no way I can avoid burning when I walk into a church from now on.
She told me she loved my new hairstyle. I told her its called head head.
I want to bone him until his eyes fall out
My talents include parallel parking and over reacting about absolutely everything.. And drinking..
I just found your "it's drinking time" note in my chem notes. Why did this never happen??
I was waiting for you to find it...I'll be over in 5
Randomize
