Yeah..And after he fingered me, he wiped it on my face and laughed.
ew wtf
I went to the gynecologist and they said, "you're the most fun person we've ever had," and i thought, "that's exactly why i'm here!"
Woman walking into toby keith concert: 8 months pregnant, black eye, shirt on that has a picture of a boot and the words "we'll put a boot up your ass" with an american flag printed over--the sleeves were ripped off and she had a camo cowboy hat. Greatest thing I've ever seen.
Girl just texted me a pic of her boobs with the caption "don't think I'm a whore"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
sometimes i think i'm bisexual but then i realize the only girl i'm attracted to is myself.
he has a puerto rico area code and says his name is johnny cash. extremely suspect
Just paid a $5 cover at a bar I stumbled by so I could puke in a toilet and not in public.
I walked into my room to see them crying, watching hey arnold, and passing a franzia box back and forth...
He is so amazingly handsome. I just wanna fuck every shred of decency out of him.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I offered to buy ihop waffles for all the homeless people outside the metro. It was time to go to bed.
Bring scissors.....i think im gonna have to be cut out of this damn jockstrap
And that facial hair. He might as well shave it so it spells "douche" on one cheek and "nozzle" on the other.
Is it rude to say "I hate you because you live inside Hillary Clinton's asshole"?
He stopped mid-fuck to explain his choice in pillows. HE WAS STILL IN ME!
I feel a blackout coming on
Plz don't have me burst into your house saying you're late for re airport to rescue you from a fat girl again
That was 2 times
Randomize