i fucked some guy last night. i called him nick jonas by mistake. i'm 24.
Sorry I couldn't answer your call, I'm expecting a call from Chris Hansen.
I'm guessing you didn't end up going to the bar last night.
Nope. Ended up at what I believe was a slumber party down the street.
And that's when I found out that Patrick wasn't in fact down with O.P.P.
I can't tell if I miss summer or 5 times a day sex more.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I hope this doesn't change things. I feel that me being a minor made it more exciting.
Remember that pineapple I soaked in vodka last month? Just found it- nothing is growing on it? Think it's safe?
This will never work out with him unless I somehow learn how to unhinge my jaw like a python.
I think we need to have a day of drinking in classes. I know we don't share any, but sacrifices need to be made.
Ways to ruin a one night stand: the guy finds your parenting magazine on your dorm room desk.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just told my mom I need money for Molly. She was not happy
VOOOODKA VOOODKA WE PLEDGE OUR LOVE TO THEEEE VODKAAAA VODKAAAA SAVIOR OF LIBERTYYYY
its the pipe that keeps on giving. Just when I think it's done, I scrape just enough. It's a st. Patrick's day miracle!
He's mad at me because I said I wouldn't date him if his dick was smaller. I fail to see the issue
Drunk sperm are not productive sperm.
Girl behind me in line at CVS was getting impatient then outta nowhere blew up shouting that if she didn't get her plan B soon she might be a mom and that if we couldn't tell she'd be a horrible mom
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