so my mom just told me that she wouldnt pick me up and take us to taco bell at 3AM...
I have been thinking about it and I am really glad we decided to order helmets.
i stopped calling them hangovers and started calling mornings a long time ago.
well, it ended with me crying outside the strip club saying i don't want to be 21 anymoree. i'd say it was a great 21st birthday.
I told her she has a very organized vagina; somehow she took offense.
Two dudes got up on top of the pianos and danced shirtless. They didnt even get kicked out. I love vegas
Well I knew we were drunk when I told you it was a good idea to shit in the ocean
him being a republican bothers me way more than his coke problem.
I just had to take a picture of someone whose testicles are bigger than my fists combined. Living the dream.
I still have your make up all over the inside of my thighs from the face sitting. Free tonight?
He kept squeezing my butt and telling me how smart I was
I'll send you pictures of my nipples so you don't feel left out.
When he mumbled "I can't feel my legs," proceeded to stand, fall over, and just lay there I knew I'd given great head...
How was your night?
I spent a lot of money and drank a lot of booze. Also was part of a successful search party
because he's a firefighter, wouldn't sleeping with him be like saying thank you to the community?
Randomize
