Yea and his cousin visited from central and i fucked her i was texting him at work teasin him about it but sent it to his mom by accident
there's a taquito in the driveway. If it's not yours I'm going to eat it.
thats what you get for writing a paper after liquor pitchers
its only a rough draft.
Listen. I'm a changed woman. I have no problem using him for sex.
I really have to stop waking up in hot tubs on Friday mornings.
Washing vom off hardwood, so much easier than carpet. Thank you adulthood!
The only requirement is that his name is Kevin... All other factors don't matter to drunk me. Drunk me likey Kevins.
I tried exercising today. I ended up masturbating to the Wii fit trainer.
I am going to be fat forever.
I'm in a bed full of sand, and also just took my contacts out. Whatever happened yesterday was great, I think.
I will pee on everything he values.
I just pictured ballsacks being shoveled into the furnace of the Titanic.
The 78 year old woman who works next to me divorced her ex husband, remarried her first husband, and retired all in one day. I'd say it makes your breakup on Valentine's day pretty insignificant.
the only things my left hand does: catch/hold things and masturbation.
You'll love it there. Trust me. Cheap tequila, pretentious beer, tall white guys who will treat you badly. Its got everything you like.
Happiness is laying in bed, topless, pouring 4 packs of hot sauce on your taco bell.
Randomize
