just do it
fine only cuz shes asian
dude, my own friends sent me home from a party last night. real cool assholes. real cool
I need to have sex with you on our hotel room window ledge... This is a need not a request.
Sometimes when I see a shoe on the side of the road, I get a little depressed that I've never partied that hard.
My halloween constume SCREAMS "Hey i just got done with a shitty relationship and I'm DTF"
Oh my god what did I do. My hands are scraped, there are pickles on the floor, my clothes are wet, and I don't remember how I get here. Thank you.
She's doing hand stands on the train as I type. Idk if I'm impressed it embarrassed. Or turned on.
of course we have a beer bong
how else would we feed our christmas tree
I just want a sensitive guy who will get drunk with me then take me out to steal things. Is that too much to ask?
Somehow I got food poisoning AND alcohol poisoning in the same night. Its like everything I love is trying to kill me. I'm waiting for my tv to make its move.
The language barrier was annoying .... So we just had sex. That is how you deal with not being able to chat isn't it???
I DONT HAVE A FUCKING JOB RIGHT NOW. DO YOU THINK I HAVE TIME TO WASTE GOING BACK AND FORTH WITH SOMEONE WHOS LYING, ABOUT LYING, AND JUST BEING A LIAR? HONESTLY, YES I DO HAVE TIME. BUT I HAVE A FUCKING LOT BETTER THINGS I COULD BE WASTING MY TIME DOING. LIKE ORGANIZING MY POKEMON CARD COLLECTION.
DO NOT LET HIM TAKE CONTROL OVER YOUR BOWELS
He told us a story about a time his 80 year old uncle karate chopped a dick in a glory hole.
May have told my history professor I wanted him to stuff me like a turkey. Too slutty?
Nah, people appreciate the creativity of seasonal sluttiness. Let me know if it works!!!
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