guess who just spent driver's ed figuring out how to draw a guy giving head
You were spooning my trash can and I had to crumble cookies on the floor by your face to get you to eat
So after I was tied with a feather boa he left me there with KFC and cherry coke
We made a bong out of a plastic football. I can honestly say we make a good team.
There's a really old guy here with a really young girl. I'm guessing he has to make choo choo train noises to get his dick in her mouth.
she fascinated with the iron the back of the toilet seat. she made me sit in the bathroom with her for a solid 10 minutes while she just stared and laughed at it
He was uncircumcised
It was like inception. A penis within a penis within a penis
He's basically wearing those Nike boner sweatpants. It's hard not to jump him. How has your day been?
He's carved the words "SLAM STATION" into his headboard...
this dude, we had a connection. he kept smiling at me. it's like he knew i was gonna facebook stalk the fuck out of him
Last night dinner was cinnamon buns and whiskey. At least tonight I had a fajita with my cookies and tequila. I may be a little stressed about these end of semester tests.
I came so hard I burst a blood vessel in my eye. If i cant marry this girl, I'm gonna have to switch teams.
Ugh. Lets go crawl into a dairy-gluten-chlamydia free hole somewheres.
Googling enemas while I get a pedicure ... My life in one senence
This is not okay. I only like one boy. I should like 200 boys and be having wild unprecedented sex. Instead I like one boy whose a born again virgin.
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