You blewit but ill be back in laekciew tonigthso calll mee
I just found a dead bug in my nose. if that's the worst thing up there im considdering myself lucky.
It's all fun and games until the last slice of pizza gets bong water spilled on it.
They were so loud I wrote them a sex critique and taped it to his door.
i caught the condom in my mouth.. dont ask me how
it wasn't the penis i had been hoping for.....but i took it regardless.
okay. so this hammed chick got arrested and she keeps trying to make out with the cop. i like her style.
just peed on the 7/11 floor and casually left. Omg so drunk
Dude she has starbursts in her sports bra. I feel like this is counter productive.
Jacob lost his virginity in a threesome. I am deffs fucking this kid.
DURING A THUNDERSTORM ON HIS BIRTHDAY.
He didn't call me beautiful but he came in less than five minutes so same thing, right?
She just sent me a message. It's a poem, about eternal love, that she wrote, about us. Just because I took her home two nights - doesn't mean it's eternal love.
I mean, it's just pathetic when the standard is tinder and he can't live up to it.
I wasn't even hungover I was just mourning my dignity
we woke up when the front wall of the house caught fire.
Randomize
