He insisted on sleeping in my bed. Had he taken all of my obvious hints I would have sucked his dick. He only wanted to snuggle. My world has been turned upside down.
every single one of us blacked out. we woke up the next morning and it was like the night never happened. IT'S STILL A MYSTERY
I made out with Jen. We were naked. I'm still gay. Forever
It was ths the worst 15 minutes of my life. . . It was like fucking a warm stick of butter.
Got some good news and bad news about the hayride this weekend.
The good news is its still on, the bad news is we don't have any hay. The best news, if you drink enough you won't give a fuck that its just a trailer.
THC water in my coffee on the way to work. How's your Tuesday?
I just want a guy that likes cats and is willing to get a vasectomy. IS THAT SO MUCH TO ASK?!
hungover waitressing a bar association event. im being judged by actual judges.
I vaguely remember making out with his tattoo (?) and giving him an awesome massage and then I passed out on his floor. Shrug
Who says there aren't gentlemen anymore? My one night stand warmed up my car for me
I just found a contact in my phone named "Sam 'it Won't Fit' Wilson". No clue when or where it came from....
He texted me at 2am telling me to come get my American flag from his place, if that's not code for sex idk what is
I told him to come over when I realized that I did have time for a quick booty call before church.
This is either the best idea i've ever had or the worst. stay tuned.
I hummed the theme from jaws while she was taking the pregnancy test....needless to say she was not pleased
Randomize