Kroger has a sale on economy packs of some ridic brand of condom with a smiley devil heart on it $4.99 for 24
Sounds like a baby waitign to happen
I had a dream last night that I was the one that killed Biggie
that shit musta been laced I laughed for two hours and everyone looked like penguins
The guy in front of me in lecture is using a fifth of smirnoff as a water bottle.
Nevermind, it's not water.
Family bonfire. I just discovered my cousin drank an entire bottle of champagne at the age of 7. I just got showed up.
and the award for most disgusting thing ever done on my couch now officially goes to you! Congratulations, you won the couch...I can't even look at it anymore.
Fell asleep on the Grass at Lolla woke up in the Brown line. What. The. Fuck.
And if it was a miscarriage you should figure out whose it was. He must be an alphamale for his offspring to sustain life this long in the amusement park that is your body
All I can see in the pic you sent is white shorts...
Thas my pasnts in colleg! Tehy glow! AND SMELL LIKE BEER!
I'm gonna rob all up in that cradle
one of these days i'm gonna do a sparkly magical girl transformation into snoop dogg
You know you've made it in life when the people in the next stall are cheering on your orgasm
Hooked up with another cop last night. Think I am renaming my vagina "dispatch"
I just saw elmo dancing with gumby. The bars at 7a.m. are AWESOME.
I can't wait to see you & have espresso-fueled sex
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