And mexicans. My burrito likes you.
You screamed, "I am going to fuck this cheeseburger". They all started laughing until you actually started having sex with the cheeseburger.
She told me I was starting to look like a mermaid with herpes and I needed to stop it.
i have now learned nap means the same thing as sex in college
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i was just skypeing her and i saw the vagisil medicated wipes in the corner of her room. i'll be breaking this off tomorrow
We can smell you smoking weed from downstairs and your little brother is asking why the upstairs smells like gasoline. Please smoke in the basement. XOXO dad.
He looked at me like he has never had a girl throw up on him before.
i wish i coudl send you meat via computure
The fairy wings and cowboy hats were not the issue. The bag of cocaine that I held in the air as we drove in the parade might have been.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just broke a sweat shaving my own vagina. Something has got to change.
Crazy fun. I think I got a concussion from a stripper
Oh dude I know. When something that's supposed stop pregnancies taste like chocolate something's up
nm just hungover. watching movies and roasting marshmallows in bed, over a candle to avoid life
Okay, tomorrow we'll have a day of life-sorting and plasma-selling.
Wait, but now I'm curious. In what position were y'all when the cops came? Were you guys butt ass naked in the car? 😂😂
Randomize