he didn't want to fuck because he was too busy skateboarding. what are we 12? I'm too old for this shit.
I think we need to stop being best friends, its not good for our vaginas.
My costume is made up of 4 inch heels and a firefighter costume I'm borrowing from the dramatic play area of my Pre-K classroom. I told you I could still be slutty on a teacher's salary.
And then you guys went on to show us ur sex positions from the before. Thanks
On the plus side I got to ride in a fire truck and I didn't have to blow anybody for it
I'm currently day drinking, studying and making corn. Don't tell me what I can't do.
Sorry for rubbing my feet on you and repeating "good pony, stay."
That man gives me hope. I can't help it. And by "hope" I mean "wood."
Nope, had to pee on the side got violated by tall grass. Then someone came around the corner and I had to stop mid pee to dive into the car.. Pants down
He found a way to charmingly ask me for a threesome and when I said no he made it sound like he was even happier. He's a fucking wizard
Just so you know, I woke up with 2 oven mits in my bed and no clothes on.
You should know two things about me,,,1) I am highly sexual and 2) I am HIGHLY competitive so you telling me about how much sex you had with the other girl makes me say "challenge accepted"... you should hydrate.
He had all the grace of a fucking hippo and the emotional control of a five year old
bitch, i have a flask. i've got things under control.
god. marry me.
I think he is using me to sort through his relationship issues, past and present. I did not sign up for this. All I want is booty. Am I the dude in this relationship?
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