I can't remember if we talked about feelings. Fuck you Miller High Life.
Well hey if hot cowboys are involved then all bets are off.
You pulled the fire alarm because you had to shit and there was someone in the bathroom. you said you needed privacy
Apparently, his doctor was impressed with how well we took care of his leg. We're like the kings of naked triage.
I have a video (on my shattered iphone) of a random DJ at some bar giving me a birthday shoutout and texts from random numbers talking about birthday sex. My birthday is in April... Happy birthday to me?
She took a crow from her moms Halloween decorations, taped it to her shoulder, went to the bar and made the guys buy a drinks for both her and the crow.
SIMBAAAA REMEBER WHO YOU ARE
So the bartender tried kicking me out but i screamed im an RA you cant kick me out
YES please come visit. Lets go get belligerent. I won't even pepperspray you
Dude, there are some things that you can't un-see. Her, beached on a dog bed, is one of them.
How are you feeling?
I mean, shattered dignity aside, not bad.
I've been rehabbing my soul with cheese and wine lately
What has my life become? I'be officially recruited my fuck buddy for help getting my ex back.
Here's the thing. Kinda drunk. Eating leftover soup. In bed. Watching Disney channel.
Nothing personal but yes I would be suspicious If I saw 3 guys and 2 girls in the same bathroom stall together
Randomize
