alex threw up in my bong. i'm going to call it a night.
once the "do it" chant starts, any shot at an even remotely dignified party experience is dead.
Fuck now we have to have sex
What?
In a bet, need to win
I got you a housewarming gift. It starts with "A" and ends with "bottle of Jameson"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I will now refer to my life as before and after I used Astroglide for the first time
of course! give me a few hours to recover from chugging a 4loko out of a frisbee, and it will be rage time yet again
I'm that hungover student in class ... On a wednesday morning
Omg I think I'm in the wrong class
I seriously told a stripper I would hold her hand when she goes to get ass implants.
Ugh did we play golf last night and did you by chance hit my head with a club or a ball?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Walk back down Church toward Mass Ave. Take a right and head for the guy in a kilt on top of the really tall unicycle. C u soon!
I have to stop letting him stay all weekend. I feel like a cored apple.
god dammit I AM NO LONGER PUTTING UP WITH YOUR HETEROSEXUALITY I QUIT
I don'y know if I should feel accomplished or disgusted. I just ate a dozen cookies all to myself. I'm leaning more towards accomplished.
fucking him is like fucking old faithful. you could set your watch by his orgasms.
She's throwing a party for a guy that just got out of rehab?
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