i should go to a nude beach and wear just a condom, then ill have tan lines on my dick
Drunk in some girls audi what the fuck is happenin i love sb
it's ELEVEN
thirty
im doing shots everytime lil jon says it in the song shots....blackout town here i come
Our cab driver just admitted to beating up kids in the 60's who didn't smoke pot...
walking on campus just saw the exact moment some kids life got ruined
he's on the phone and just starts going "FUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUCCCCCCCCKKKKK", then follows it with "Are you sure your pregnant?"... made my day
all he has to do is look at me on new years and hes getting laid. thats how hot he is
We were in the shower and he sat down an wouldn't do anything. I'm so glad he manscapes. It made washing his balls less awkward.
I just very easily got pretty high off of one bowl of shitty dirt weed. I'm a sad excuse for who I used to be.
I think drinking everclear was a better idea than taking a night class.
She was touching herself and looking a shoes online. My debt is bad enough without bringing that hot mess into my life.
Well I never thought in the future I'd be able to say "hey remember that Easter I made porn?"
He was an asshole the entire night and then tried to touch my dick in a Michaels craft store.
Sooooo, no second date?
Then his buddy called and said "my car broke down, I need a ride. If I'm not home by midnight they'll extend my house arrest." And I knew it was time to leave.
Your sister just admitted to being a " much bigger bitch" than you. So you've got that going for you, which is nice.
I’m not saying you’re wrong, I’m just saying he’s denying what you’re saying.
Randomize