First shot of my 21st. 11 a.m. in econ class. Success.
I'll tell you what, we couldn't have asked for better binge-drinking weather.
No one even knew you were hurt until we saw the multiple cuts to prove it, and when we asked what happened all you could say was "I fell out"
i think he just broke into a bike shop his last text said something about hiding in some tree
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Our idea of a "deep conversation" was successfully forming complete sentences.
What did you give her? She's trying to tape her wrists so her hands don't fall off.
I think I'm gonna wear a bikini to our final tomorrow...just so he knows that no fucks will be given on his test
Want to go home, so casually slip my underwear in his pocket. Never seen him grin so big and say goodbye to his friends.
Sorry about the picture of wills balls via snapchat last night btw
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Your life is one shit show away from being a lifetime movie.
I spilt beer on the table, and she quickly got a straw and yelled party foul and made me drink it.
We were having sex and my nose just started pouring blood. He reached down to the floor, grabbed a sock and held it to my nose. He just kept pounding away like nothing was happening.
We turned a wake into a bar crawl.
I know you're having some issues right now but can we focus on the gangbang?
I just slammed a bottle of white wine before I came to Whole Foods so basically I'm just training to be a middle aged white woman.
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