Saw some pubes in our toilet, hope the new look works out tonight.
He had some BAD nuttage
Nuttage?
It's like cleavage......... but different
Tonight, I'm planning on being a bigger trainwreck than Britney Spears circa 2007.
This just in: Jon Gosselin's address-The Alexandra. I bet if we showed up he'd date us.
Starbucks introducing alcohol. i hear angels singing.
walkin around the woods blazed, drawing pictures of trees and plants, i get a grade for this
Leave it to him to get us kicked out of a bar for hitting on an 80 year old woman. I want to be that wasted one day.
STOP CALLING ME LADY CHLAMYDIA
I'm having Vietnam flashbacks. This Kid I hooked up with is speaking in class and I keep experiencing the terror.
Just got a nosebleed, my period and the runs all at the same time. I'm either dying, or this is the first sign of the apocalypse. You warning you in case it's the latter.
Someone posted a printout of my tits on my door this morning! Where did they get this photo!?!
My one night stand from last night is currently mowing my lawn for me.
I was so close to going to get my nipples pierced with my mom today
he bought me ice cream then took me home and fucked the shit outta me. you can't write this kinda romance.
I'm unsure if I could pee myself at this point in my life
Randomize