Help. Asians are flirting in front of me(773): They speak asian
so after morning sex, she rolled a joint and turned on sports center
you might have found the rare bro goddess. i thought they were myth
Hey, could you leave the door unlocked? Keys seem hard right now.
"Is there dairy in semen?" was in her recent google searches...so she's lactose intolerant AND a slut.
Agreed. Everyone should experience a blackout before 3pm in their lifetime.
I just peed in the Schreyer honors college shrubbery. Thanks honors students, you're finally good for something
This is how I ended up being the slutty friend isn't it?
About six hours after the bottle of smirnoff, I was googling "losing your stomach lining" and calling my mom for help. She has experience.
You drunkenly hook up with 5 people in one night and suddenly everyone tries to party with you.
The cops just came to this party I'm at and ate all of our snacks
Dude just crushed our bbq lays and told us to quiet down
Of the 4 nights I've gone downtown this week, I've been "piss in the parking lot" drunk 5 times
I can not be a lesbian living on Beaverland.
He spent three years trying to get a chance with me and finally broke me down. then he came in two minutes and was so upset he locked himself in the bathroom so I helped myself to his weed and left. Wanna get stoned?
He's honking my boob in his sleep
It's innocent and endearing in some way
She dropped the call after she told me she doesn't want to hear about how loud he can scream.
Randomize
