...is it true? will i see you next weekend
YES.
ah, i can't wait till there's negative 2 inches between us
2 nights ago she wants to see other people, tonight she wants to have a threesome. The GOOD kind of threesome. So... win?
i jus got home and totaly forgot i had nut all over the back of my shirt
..im mad u rememberd about that
I feel like I would bang a guy with a dick piercing just to say I have...like climbing a huge mountain or somethig
Dude turns out her best friend is lesbian...there is no wingman for this situation
Meghan got a job at the bar. We're now morally obligated to drink. Is this what dreams are made of?
Chicken wings don't come back up an through your nose as easily as you'd think
Attempting to sleep without a bra since i got my nips pierced wish me luck. Also almost sent that to my coworker.
I have to date her we need a place to stay for tailgating
I'm wearing fairy wings and I broke my wizard staff. If this isn't the most happy but sad moment of my life , I don't know what is.
You know you had a good time when you get the wheelchair treatment in Mexico back to your cruise.
Jamie's fucking a senior citizen and I'm eating chips and salsa in the shower at 2am, so whatever you're doing it can't be worse.
Whoever was the bastard/bitch/genius who duct taped my keys to my dick so I wouldn't lose them. I hate you.
You laid on the floor and pet their rug. and then demanded Voss water.
There’s a child, alone, sitting on a picnic table out there, making bird noises
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