His dick was so small it sat perched on top of his balls like it was king of his scrotum.
Hurry up I might actually study if I am left alone
What? Cold floors are soothing when you have a hangover. How am I supposed to pass that up. Even if I'm at my parents house
Recent Google searches: "babu kangarooz"... "why 2 tacos bell" and "is dinosaur in real life"
She has puke in her hair, is missing a shoe and is now crying. People trust her to be their child's teacher
so not only am i rooming with two chicks on the volleyball team, but we just put down the deposit on a hot tub. this is going to be the best summer ever for my dick.
I'm trying to find candidates for my winter break hook up. I'm going to hold auditions thanksgiving break.
She who has the vag holds all the power. He will learn one way or the other.
the whole bar just wished me luck with my booty call tonight
Like he and the nurses kept being so persistent with it and I just wanted to run out of there in my backless gown and yell FUCK OFF BITCHES IM OUT
Let us ponder on the good times. Ya know when the Jonas brothers were incapable of growing facial hair and I didn't fully understand what a dick looks like
So hungover and decided to eat a burrito and a pot brownie for dinner, this is what adulthood looks like.
roommate singing save a horse ride a cowboy wearing a cowboy hat a bikini and jeans while humping the couch.
got some info she was last seen with some guy wearing goggles
Naptime over. I've got fresh contacts and tequila. RAAAAAAGE!
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