Pls tell me she didnt actually sign a nutsack.
and this is why I hate my dad. He got 25x more angry with me when I wanted to drive a different route then he suggested to get to his house (more scenic- thus more enjoyable) then he did when I told him I was driving drunk with 4 people in the car and I got my 5th speeding ticket last night.
You told her the u were going to wrap your dick around her neck and start her like a lawn mower. thats why she left.
I have no idea. Next thing I know we're all down on one knee saying the pledge of allegiance and then singing I'm Proud to be an American. Then Trevor ate pizza off the sidewalk.
did you really just refer to me me as an old fashioned penis?
I full on slapped a girl with pizza. Like in the face with sauce splattered everywhere and grease with a hard slap to the face.
I feel like the other woman.
You ARE the other woman.
You do realize there's a subtle difference between not remembering your outfit from april 17th of last year vs forgetting that last night you undressed in the street and were grabbing every dick you could reach, right?
Omg! I'm gonna have a heat stroke. I'm going to collect my sweat and drink it for a buzz and hydration purposes
Close. The correct answer is shitting in a public toilet. We also would have accepted the pit of despair.
She seriously spent 30 minutes trying to make balloon animals out of my limp dick...
...
Exactly.
So yeah never trust sex tips from yahoo answers
A valentines day commercial would come on while I'm masturbating...
Literally just napped at strip club. Don't know how long
I JUST FARTED SO LOUD AND HARD I IMMEDIATELY TASTED IT
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