Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(512): View more from Texas

3.50 mugs at the bar.

(1-512): View more from Texas

Nah man, im with an ugly chick. Im waiting til everyone's drunk enough tonight, they don't notice.

(512): View more from Texas

How ugly, and does she have friends?

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(512): 3.50 mugs at the bar. (1-512): Nah man, im with an ugly chick. Im waiting til everyone's drunk enough tonight, they don't notice. (512): How ugly, and does she have friends? http://tfl.nu/peow

Replies (40) Good night (792) Bad night (1230)
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(732): View more from New Jersey

i don't plan on having that self control this summer

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(732): i don't plan on having that self control this summer http://tfl.nu/15c3

Replies (8) Good night (2143) Bad night (642)
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(609): View more from New Jersey

I was being carried out of the bar, but then my friend saw Pat who just got kicked out scaling the wall to sneak back in, so he carried me back in, sat me on the bar stool, and the bartender just let us all keep drinking.

(215): View more from Pennsylvania

Being persistent has its perks my friend.

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(609): I was being carried out of the bar, but then my friend saw Pat who just got kicked out scaling the wall to sneak back in, so he carried me back in, sat me on the bar stool, and the bartender just let us all keep drinking. (215): Being persistent has its perks my friend. http://tfl.nu/wzcm

Replies (11) Good night (3791) Bad night (606)
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(210): View more from Texas

Dude why does my asshole itch so bad?

(1-210): View more from Texas

I'll teach you how to wipe better

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(210): Dude why does my asshole itch so bad? (1-210): I'll teach you how to wipe better http://tfl.nu/7pt4

Replies (11) Good night (634) Bad night (2635)
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(210): View more from Texas

I'm going to make him fall in love with me one blow job at a time.

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(210): I'm going to make him fall in love with me one blow job at a time. http://tfl.nu/1zig

Replies (23) Good night (5135) Bad night (1302)
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(843): View more from South Carolina

She spent a lot of time to get her cleavage to look that good. It would be rude not to stare. It shows you are paying attention. Chicks dig that.

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(843): She spent a lot of time to get her cleavage to look that good. It would be rude not to stare. It shows you are paying attention. Chicks dig that. http://tfl.nu/vu87

Replies (14) Good night (7248) Bad night (1251)
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(970): View more from Colorado

Nothing like a Mormon bachlorette party to make you feel slutty

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(970): Nothing like a Mormon bachlorette party to make you feel slutty http://tfl.nu/gq3b

Replies (9) Good night (4192) Bad night (1086)
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(613): View more from Ontario

Had to awkwardly dig through all my fake ID's to get my real one so I could vote.......Model citizen over here.

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(613): Had to awkwardly dig through all my fake ID's to get my real one so I could vote.......Model citizen over here. http://tfl.nu/o8um

Replies (8) Good night (4094) Bad night (840)
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(217): View more from Illinois

I'm at a winery and there's a 50 yr old woman sitting at a table alone with a bottle of wine and the only time I've seen her get up is to harass the hot dog guy

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(217): I'm at a winery and there's a 50 yr old woman sitting at a table alone with a bottle of wine and the only time I've seen her get up is to harass the hot dog guy http://tfl.nu/0wt3

Replies (5) Good night (1684) Bad night (691)
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(970): View more from Colorado

You were walking around in your swim suit, an open robe, snow boots and a death grip on that handel of captain morgan.

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(970): You were walking around in your swim suit, an open robe, snow boots and a death grip on that handel of captain morgan. http://tfl.nu/do61

Replies (14) Good night (2070) Bad night (628)
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(201): View more from New Jersey

You know what I'm hearing? Blah, blah, blah, I have pneumonia, blah, blah, blah, I'm a quitter. COME OVER AND PUT YOUR PENIS INSIDE ME.

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(201): You know what I'm hearing? Blah, blah, blah, I have pneumonia, blah, blah, blah, I'm a quitter. COME OVER AND PUT YOUR PENIS INSIDE ME. http://tfl.nu/tcyr

Replies (15) Good night (4925) Bad night (927)
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(334): View more from Alabama

She frightens me and turns me on at the same time. She's a keeper

(205): View more from Alabama

Restraining order pending?

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(334): She frightens me and turns me on at the same time. She's a keeper (205): Restraining order pending? http://tfl.nu/xpcn

Replies (6) Good night (1400) Bad night (630)
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(503): View more from Oregon

I mean he did ask and he said it's cold out but i didn't realize we were that comfortable hahaha sex is one thing but borrowing a sweatshirt?

(1-503): View more from Oregon

Locking that text forever.

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(503): I mean he did ask and he said it's cold out but i didn't realize we were that comfortable hahaha sex is one thing but borrowing a sweatshirt? (1-503): Locking that text forever. http://tfl.nu/8ooh

Replies (0) Good night (962) Bad night (499)
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(608): View more from Wisconsin

WHY AM I CRAWLING IN OLDER MEN HOLY JESUS

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(608): WHY AM I CRAWLING IN OLDER MEN HOLY JESUS http://tfl.nu/ztcl

Replies (2) Good night (367) Bad night (520)
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(248): View more from Michigan

You can't give me tequila around boys who have girlfriends. That ain't new.

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(248): You can't give me tequila around boys who have girlfriends. That ain't new. http://tfl.nu/nx9b

Replies (0) Good night (347) Bad night (389)

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