Strip flip cup NEVER equals good idea
Bar closing I am hiding in the bathroom. do you think anyone will find me?
Babe! I just farted and I swear to jesus lord christ that it sounded like ur name! Ok, more like Meeatt but still... awesome.
how the fuck does easy mac keep making itself at 3am when i'm wasted? what is this phenomenon?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you don't know how close you are to someone till they ask you to shave their ass.
We were hooking up, both of us naked. She starts putting her clothes back on and says, "I have to go to the bathroom." I reply, "No you don't, you're leaving." Without hesitation she looks at me and says, "Yeah."
This place doesnt have redbull or serve shots. Its like they are at war with fun.
bad decision saturdays are such a good decision
Tell your boss that he's keeping you from eating a fuck sundae off of these 36-24-36 34 D's waiting for you at home on Valentine's Day.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He insisted on us having sex while watching the biggest loser and asked me if I could "resist the temptation".
I'm functioning at the level of a challenged walrus.
Most violent shit of my life. New Years resolution of eating better is already kicking me in the face.
Hey.. Here's a thought for the evening. There's only two more sleeps until I fuck you so hard my back teeth will convulse.. Here's too Tuesday! Woohooooo
do i respond to the booty call for the guy with the bigger dick or the one who has the gourmet coffee i like so much? at this point i'm leading toward the coffee
Don't worry you weren't as drunk as you thought. You only fell 4 times.
Randomize