She said her name was "party"
Cuntadactyl. (n). A pre-historic dinosaur of Mandy-like features that is primarily identified by it's inability to play well with others and overall C-word demeanor. Physically, an unfortunate appearance.
Its a three day weekend with Valentines day thrown in... Im obligated to get drunk
Wish you were here....
And I wish your mouth was around my cock, but that never happens, does it?
These Attractive Criminals Took Sexy Mugshots That Made Them Famous
So I just googled the ten commandments... Were fucked.
The slutty girl scout law, revised for halloween 10: on my honor i will try, to serve my vagina and my shot glass. To hold back friends hair at all voming moments and to live by the sluttly girl scout law.
Home, forcing the cats to make out. Someone should get some.
You did a line of free coke with an obese Slovenian unlicensed cab driver in the toilets of the most questionable strip club in the country. New low man.
When you put it like that, I'm inclined to agree.
I don't really know how to explain this place...it's like I feel like I need an std just to fit in
Regardless of the amount of alcohol you may consume tonight - DON'T take anybody home
This Girl’s Unbelievable Catfish Story Will Make You Rethink Online Dating
I can't believe you're asking me to think of a sincere, creative way to apologize to your penis at 2 am.
he gave me a thermos so I could take my coffee with my on drive of shame. I was unexpectedly grateful...
I can tell right now that knowing you will either be really fun or ruin my life
He asked me if I wanted to blow his whistle and proceeded to pull out an actual whistle.
DO NOT THROW SOUP AT YOUR SCREEN
i need some fresh meat. meat that has a license and a job and isn’t a FULL-blown alcoholic. partial i could tolerate, bc, haha, let’s be honest, me likey my drinkies.