I bet farrah fawcett is having words with michael jackson in heaven for stealing her thunder
is it sad that pink shorts and cowboy hats remind me of getting jizz in the hair?
One of her kids, Dakota I think, got stuck in a ceiling fan and she had a fit, thats when she found the penis hat.
I still can't believe I found a dildo in my ceiling today.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
sweetheart all i remember is you throwing up and saying "i thought things would be better now that barack obama is president"
So I'm pretty sure I fucked the dept of homeland security guy on my kitchen table. No recollection of it, but there are signs.
Did you spray paint that captain morgan fifth that's in the freezer gold?
When I start carrying a bottle in my hand, jumping from boat to boat with a grenade horn. YOU should know this isn't going to turn out well.
Everyone already knows you're a drunk, they understand.
I just pull a splinter from the head of my penis. It was a rough night.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
GOOD NIGHT DREAM OF ALCOHOL SNO CONES
Everyone was passed out so I turned off the lights and locked all the doors. I also took the chicken sandwich in the microwave as payment.
Is he the circus guy or the bi-curious street preacher?
Is biking from my house to 6th street for liquor pitchers a good idea or a bad idea
My ex came over to hook up...then I went on a date 2 hours later and got a bj. Single: Finally doing it right.
I'm kinda sad I'm leaving the bank. I never got to have rough sex in the vault.
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