Far right against the wall..hiding come find me. dont tell oyhers hahaha
Midnight walks are trippy
I tried to do that earlier, but I was alone and scared, so I stole a happy Birthday balloon.
I couldn't deal, she's a vegetarian. Every woman should like a little meat in their mouths.
All I want for christmas is my sobriety back.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
That taco smell coming from your belly button was a huge turnoff
Just used a champagne bottle to outline a trigonometric circle for math 104.. should i give up on life now or later?
Sucks about the cops last night
to be honest when I first looked up I wanted to know who was coming from a costume party..
Youre on making sure I dont black out around fat chicks duty
I'm taking a leave of absence and sending myself to fat camp. I'll let you know when I'm out.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just hit on a guy in a doughnut store... is that too suggestive?
he was definitely tindering while i gave him head
I shit you not. Dude complemented me for being meme savvy. You could drown a toddler in my panties right now.
You are ridiculously similar to a unicorn, and I want to fuck that unicorn.
The cop busted in, made the music stop, and goes "GUYS LISTEN UP! DRINK, DO DRUGS, HAVE UNPROTECTED SEX, I DONT GIVE A FUCK, JUST QUIET DOWN!" Best. Cop. Ever.
U were so upset when the shower ruined ur nachos. I didn't kno what to do.
Randomize