Using pot as a way to stop crying probably isn't a good sign huh?
Meh, some people pop Prozac, you smoke weed. Po-tay-to. po-tah-to
Seriously. Destroy her vagina. Do it like an angry baboon mating with a gentle manatee.
He famously once noted that women should wear white "like all other domestic appliances,"
he had his head down and said he was listening for the buffalo, he had to still be drunk.
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Last time I saw him the sun was coming up and he was asleep in the student wellness parking lot. For some reason people were peeing on him.
I guess birthday shots aren't always the answer
It sounds like heaven mixed with world peace and orgasms. The acoustics in this car are awesome. Or it's the weed idk either way it's great
You may now shotgun with the bride
I DONT UNDERSTAND NIPPLES. THEY JUST POP OUT FOR NO REASON
Well somebody's had a rough day, nipple-wise
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It wasn't a basement apartment, it's his parents basement. And he wanted to show me his pet tarantula collection. I NOPED THE FUCK OUT!
Just walked into your room to get my clothes and he's still passed out in your bed. Remind me to high five you when you get home
Well, maybe we can talk about it over a drink and some crushed up vicodin.
If Plan B had a rewards card I would have earned so many free tote bags by now
He took me out to dinner to tell me we had to stop fucking so randomly
Honestly wish he pleased me as much as queso does
jump out the window naked night went bad
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