We are surrounded by old people. Heavens waiting room for sure.
oh there is nothing like the 1st beerbong of the school year
FIrst one done
How did it go?
I dunno I taled about women being treated wrong and quoted Ice T. So probably a "c"
bro i finally banged her last night on our basement couch
I'm at this frat party right now and yelled "my little 16 year old brother finally lost his virginity." They gave you a standing ovation
Also...you were trying to touch his balls without him noticing
we sixty- nined on a tennis court.. not even drunk. you say insane. i say creative genius.
How many vodka infused gummi bears count as 1 drink?
I'm obsessing over hocus pocus right now. What if I change my Grindr profile to "come little children, I'll take thee away to a land of enchantment"
If you say no to drinking on a Monday then I'm going to take you to the hospital for a MRI
Remember don't think of it as being an alcoholic until something bad happens.
Think of it as Mythbusters for people who say you're going to get arrested or die
Okay so, sorry but last night we had to put a note on your chest and a key around your neck just so you would make it home.
Sangria Flip Cup was probably one of our worse drunken decisions
She's the queen of dating. She managed to get a date with a guy who saw her puke five times in two hours.
I told the cops they couldn't arrest me until they found my shoe. Now I have the grant county cops looking for my heels by the rail road tracks.
I pelvic thrusted so hard while he was eating me out that his nose started bleeding. I think it's broken. Trophy scars, right?
Randomize
