i just fell asleep at my computer and i woke up and in the google bar it said delicious foods to eat
is it sad that pink shorts and cowboy hats remind me of getting jizz in the hair?
Never let Scott cook bacon and eggs at 2am while drunk. You should have seen the flames.
STOP acting like a freshman, you have a drivers liscence now AND a PERSCRIPTION for birth control. Dont give all sophmores a bad name. Woman Up
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
spending the week with her family was quite possibly the longest ive ever gone without having a boner
Found my little brother jerking off with a condom. he said he was "practicing"
OMG its one we used last night
My natural self cock block skills kicked in last night. I could've got on like 2 chicks but i ended up throwing up all over my van instead.
Instead of a hangover my body just feels like shame
That is a hangover
I would prefer a headache
I woke up and found a doughnut on our front porch. It's not sketchy though. More like a gift from the gods.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Nothing bonds a father and daughter like washing her puke off the front steps
I had to help him get his zipper down in front of his dad so he could pee in the bushes. That Is what moonshine does to you.
We really gotta change brands again because 2-ply is making us feel like the celebrities we aren't.
If I do nothing else today, the fact that I talked you into this is achievement in itself.
BRING KITTENS I AM A GENIUS
I mean, I already hooked up with her boyfriend. The least I can do is accept her facebook friend request.
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