oh well we may not be friends on facebook but at least i got laid
It's American, baby! There ain't nothin gross about America.
It was like a little tadpole swimming in the big ocean.
his recent searches consisted of "World record for not bathing" and "Miley Cyrus vs Taylor Swift". Not even i am that desperate.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
is it still called a breakup if its your friends boyfriend that you have stopped sleeping with?
Do you think you can get drunk by standing in a tank of vodka if it is seeping into your skin?
I mean...he was throwing up for almost 3 consecutive hours. I don't think there's a chance in hell that would have tasted even close to tolerable.
The ranger made you choose between a ticket and pouring all the beer out since it was a state park.
I've never seen you that close to tears as you poured out 30 beers.
So you're saying you don't want to be with her anymore because she likes sex to much and is just to hot?
Well when you say it that way it makes me sound like an idiot.
You are an idiot.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
And the view of you in reverse cowgirl is arguably the most spectacular view ever... And I've seen the Eiffle tower, the colosseum, mountains of Hawaii, Michaelangelo's David, and the Mona Goddamn Lisa. Just saying.
I had a dream I got back with Amanda. And then cheated on her the same day. Even my conscious is a dick
For whatever reason, whenever she's drunk off Crown, all she wants to do is jerk me off with her feet.
So his dick was definitely bigger than it looked in all the pictures he sent my daughter.
this isn't the first time drunken padiddle ended in a fist fight..
As soon as he called me 'darling' in that Scottish accent... my pants just dropped.
Randomize