This girl I work with, who is 18 btw, invited me to her baby shower. Do they sell abortions in gift certificate form?
The handjob she gave me was better than the best blowjob I've ever gotten.. Just imagine the possibilities.
Hey if there is a better reason to go drink then "I've been fucking robbed!" I have yet to hear one. Also, I've been fucking robbed.
90% sure you snuck in there somewhere, all I really remember is big boobs in my face so I'm assuming it was you.
Now you know for the next time you go in the basement to wear a helmet
Yeah, clearly. And then we can float around my room on Christmas themed inner tubes. And drink, I guess.
Last two new years I ended in jail by 12. Can we wait until its actually 12:02 this time to do something stupid. I'd like to spend the first minute of 2012 free.. At least.
I just smoked a bowl alone and took my Zyrtec here's to a full night.
It's like she fell out of an MTV reality show and no one knows how to send her back
Never thought an ATM max withdrawal could be such a good thing...
Her blow jobs are legen wait for it seriously like 9 people I know brag about them dary
I was just tongue fucked into oblivion.
However many condoms you have, it isn't enough.
I don't know why, but whenever I shave my balls I feel more aerodynamic.
And here I am, playing fetch with my cat at two in the morning.
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