dude. I'm so drunk.
pete, this is bryce's mom
I can't wait to have my cock in your ass
pete, this is still bryce's mom
Apparently you walked through my house with your dress on your head
i cant believe jose lima did steroids
apparently the kind that make you shitty at baseball
and then he said that some chick told him he danced like an epileptic on crystal meth. he then proceeded to demonstrate this statement, which i can testify is 100% accurate.
It's nice to sit in the library and see the progression from freshman pledge to 6th year coke addict all at one table. Gotta love sororities
She threw her promise ring on the ground, that's when the freak came out.
see these eyes, they just want to bone and go to sleep.
No, your dick is problems. Anyone you fuck haunts us for the rest of the semester. If you need to get laid, I'll personally drive you out of state.
you 2 were alone in the living room and the dog walked in and you started yelling what are all these people doing in here
Is this the 6 foot tall blonde I screwed in the bar last weekend?
In the bar?! Very impressive! But keep guessing!
Trying to coordinate a drug deal while taking a psych test is not easy.
Why do I like him? He literally has no redeeming qualities.
Found out the cop gives spectacular head. Don't ask. We're going out to dinner Saturday.
So much for no-infidelity-fridays....
I could see the visible disappointment when she saw my penis
Randomize