your horoscope this morning...very interesting...good luck today
Not that I thought your boyfriend was a phile
But the whole crossing guard thing? Weird.
god, a vagina is an amazing trump card
do you ever lay in the bath and watch the blood hit the water?
EWW. Don't discuss your period with me. You can go shave your back now.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
it only takes four glasses of wine for me to ride an elephant with a stranger.
just wokeup with my ethics textbook on my chest, animal crakers in my mouth and my dick in my hand. even aristotle doesn't have a theory for this one
I told her the maid must have stolen all my condoms. She bought it
You left me on the phone while you grabbed a plastic bag and started puking. I recorded it. Its my new ringtone for you
I think that last shot was nyquil. Please come gte me. WINGS.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just bought the plane tickets. Light headed. Blood rush to clit oh god blue clit. Mayday mayday vagina down!
god dammit I AM NO LONGER PUTTING UP WITH YOUR HETEROSEXUALITY I QUIT
I need to stop adding people I want to bone on LinkedIn.
..... starting now
At the light, his mom pulled up next to us while I was giving him road head. He forgot to tell me she was meeting us at the movie. So long story short, I convinced her I drove myself, pick me up in 20.
i wish i could put you in a lil box, and keep you for when i need to be blown
I swear my vagina needs to be taken away from me when I drink.
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