Bisexual people are plain selfish.
Oh. Thats cool. Im not dating anyone right now. Sean gave me chlamydia from some GUY he fooled around with. Im being abstinent.
She's holding my hand. I'm going to kill myself.
i got totally wasted at 2pm and cleaned the house bc i was bored. my mom now supports my alcohol problem
WHERE ARE MY FUCKING EYEBROWS?!
Somewhere along the night we ended up at a food lion giving jello shots to high school girls.
Recycling my beer bottles from breakfast counts for earth day, right?
I just haven't been myself lately. I slept with a guy 21 years older than me and I've been wearing my hair in a center part.
While you wait, fill out your state patrol application. Not trying to be your mom, I just really want to fuck a cop.
I just had to break into my old house and steal my sex tape. Good times. How have you been?
I offered the opportunity to grope my boobs for pints. Two girls took me up.
We single women of America need to make America great again by refusing to fuck anyone who supports Trump.
I made soup. Now I'm having post soup making wine. I had pre soup making wine also.
Guess who just set half their backyard on fire.
Please tell me youre joking.
Nope. on the brightside though, im really gonna quit smoking this time.
Remember that gum I swallowed 3 days ago? I just threw it up.... whole.
Randomize
