HOW IN THE HELL DID YOU BLOW A .24?????
We were watching I'm a celebrity get me out of here and taking shots every time heidi said HALLELUJAH, and started spraying her hair with that stupid dry shampoo shit....and we only watched the last half hour.
New. Vanessa hudgens nude pics
That text made me feel like i signed up for some awesome celeb nude pic reminder
Also, on a completely related note, just came up with an awesome business plan. You in?
u downloaded tardy 4 the party
then u started screaming about not wanting nene on the record
i dont have any money that hasnt already been designated for cigarettes and birth control
People Are Arguing Over This Guy’s Petty Reaction To Splitting Lunch With His Co-Worker
He kept saying the best defense against a lion is to punch it in the throat.
I wish guys would just cum water 'cause you don't have to worry about being pregnant and it'd be like a squirt gun fight
All the walks of shame were condensed into the hour before parents started showing up. Move out day is so bittersweet
I passed out leaning next to a light pole. When the cop woke me up at 4 AM, I told him I was a block away from the apt, just had to stop to make a puke pit stop.
My dick was out way too much saturday not to get laid
Girl Logs Into Twitter Only To Find Out Her Dad Is Trending For The Most Outrageous Reason
I can't believe he let me cut his hair as stoned as I was.. I think I even cut my own hair too
You told me "I need to pound this drinks if I'm going to pretend his dick is big enough" then left. Dollar night quotes 2012
I just took what could be the most awkward shit in my life, which considering my definition of awkward and my experiences shitting, is pretty fucking awkward.
...
I was sitting there doing my business and the guy in the stall next to me banged on the stall and asked me how to spell picnic because he wasn't sure.
Two really nice girls helped clean the taco out of my hair.
How do I send someone an apology text for giving them a lap dance in the middle of a party last night?
I'm in love. Her name is Jamie. She's beautiful. She punched me in the face.
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