dude, mark had the least successful cab ride in history last night. took a cab to the bars, stopped at every atm in the city, none worked, then had to come back to the party to beg for 20 to pay the taxi that officially took him nowhere.
Its like common courtesy of dating, the guy pays for the weed, just like dinner
My dog ate my bag of weed. Thats not the easiest call to the vet to make.
Suite mates just came in and said that we have to go to Africa. They're already packed. Didn't know you could get that high.
I'm watching the red sox through my neighbors window from my bathroom. We're winning btw.
we're making bets on your personal life
then he tried to convert me to islam
I'm pretty sure when you walk down Broadway and can pick out people you've slept with.. It might be a problem. I'm leaving for rehab tomorrow.
Way too stoned bro. Was laying down on my back and thought for a good 30 mins what it would be like to be a turtle stuck on its shell
Just once I'd like to do blow in a nice bathroom.
She is so graceful and lady-like, like a swan... On meth
Sarah is throwing up still and I'm eating salad with my fingers
Damn that sucks I haven't needed pants the whole time i've been here
I BLEED THE BLOOD OF MY ANCESTORS WHO FOUGHT SO BRAVELY FOR MY FREEDOM
cool u want pads or tampons
tampons please
He passed out while I was riding him but stayed hard long enough for me to orgasm. He definitely earned the blow job I’m going to wake him up with in the morning!
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